Midsummer

Well, that's half of the summer gone, we are at the mid point, so now we can look forward to the nights closing in, the days getting shorter.

Remember the Words of House Stark ...

You have to admire George R Martin for coming up with such a catchy and easily parodied hook for his books. Every time someone Tweets or puts on Facebook, some comment about it soon being cardigan weather, they are advertising the Song of Ice and Fire series, even if they are thinking more of the Game of Thrones TV series. Either way, it's good money coming in to the author.

I'm sure he didn't imagine that these Words would have the impact they have, I would see it as being more of a reflection of the position of House Stark, that in a world where the seasons are unpredictable, it is the ones in the north who will need to remember winter the most through the long summers, for it will hit them hardest when it returns, with or without the White Walkers.

Living in Newcastle upon Tyne, I have often wondered on the use by the TV series of the Yorkshire dialect for the Starks and their allies. I approve, by the way, but it does then rather beg the question ... does that mean that Geordies are the Night's Watch? After all we are far to the north of the "Northerners" and we have a wall running through our fair city. By extension, north of the Wall there are the wildlings of Northumberland  and the Borders, and of course the White Walkers must have Scottish accents.

Sighs: an exhalation of breath or a sign of emotional turmoil?

[Sigh]

"What's the matter?"

"Nothing, why?" 

"Ah, well, you just gave a big sigh, that's all." 

 I don't know how many of you are familiar with that little scenario, but I get it all of the time from my wife, in some permutation or other. I really think it is a gender thing, possibly the root cause of so much misunderstanding between the sexes. Obviously I cannot speak for all Malekind, but to me a sigh is just a large exhalation of breath about 80% of the time. Possibly more. Only rarely will I sigh because I feel I am sad or exasperated or whatever other feeling could be expressed by a sigh. I am far more likely to be sighing because I have been breathing shallowly and feel the need for a good oxygenating breath. Or I might sit down suddenly and exhale sharply from the change in position. 

I think that to a woman, a sigh is one of a collection of non verbal modes of communication that they employ consciously to express dissatisfaction, a sense of hopelessness, or just as a way of eliciting an emotional response from their audience, e.g. the above "What's the matter?" If that audience is another woman, fair enough. The response will probably be uttered, and the woman can either make a dramatic denial of there being anything wrong (and thus confirming that there is) or she can pour her heart out to her confidante. If the audience is a man, there is a high chance that the sigh will be misinterpreted as a needful exhalation of breath. 

Some men are naturally more attuned to sighs than others and some men learn to invest time and effort into listening for these verbal clues - especially early in a relationship, when failure to interpret a sigh at a critical juncture can result in withdrawal of privileges, possibly on a permanent basis. Failure to pick up on a well placed sigh has its own set of feedbacks in the female mind, not least of which is a feeling that there is a deliberate refusal to pick up on such an obvious message, such as the "We have been at this party far too long, they are all your friends, the music is rubbish and the food is worse, so make our excuses and let's get out of here." You have to admit that is a lot of message to fit into a simple exhalation of breath.

I think we are back full circle to the female misinterpretation of the sudden exhalation of breath. Here is where the really fertile ground for misunderstanding lies. As the female mind is more sigh conscious, the response at the top is wide open to misinterpretation. Firstly, the denial is in fact an admission that something is wrong and therefore the cue for further investigation, which leads to increasingly vehement denials from the male, who has in fact just made the mistake of breathing out a little too forcefully. The terrain gets worse if the sigh occurs during, or immediately after a conversation. This can mean that the male disapproves of whatever the female said or subsequently did and this is therefore a followed by a more intense cross examination of the hapless and increasingly bewildered male. 

 At this point the male may sigh again. This time it probably does represent an expression of emotion or exasperation.